For your first child, you can choose either the mother’s surname or the father’s surname. This surname will be given to all subsequent children. This is to ensure that all the children in a family have the same surname. You can choose your first child’s surname before birth or when registering the birth. Both parents must go to the Registrar of Births, Deaths, Marriages and Registered Partnerships to register the choice of surname. This cannot be done by one parent or in writing. It is also possibible to give both the father’s and the mother’s name: e.g. father is called Johnson, mother is called Peterson. Their child can be called Johnson, Peterson, Johnson Peterson or Peterson Johnson. When this child is grown up and gets children, it can choose for maximum two surnames as well. You can find more information on the website of the government (Dutch only)
Automatic surname
If you do not choose a surname, your child will automatically be given the father’s surname or the mother’s surname. This depends on the family situation:
Parents who are married or registered partners (of different sexes)
Your child will automatically be given the father’s surname. However, you can choose the mother’s surname instead. To do so, both parents must go to the Registrar of Births, Deaths, Marriages and Registered Partnerships to register the choice of the mother’s surname. You can do this before the birth or when registering the birth.
Unmarried parents (of different sexes)
Your child will automatically be given the mother’s surname. If you would prefer your child to be given the father’s surname, he must acknowledge the child. At the time of acknowledgement, you will also be asked for your choice of surname. To acknowledge the child and choose its surname, both parents must go to the Registrar of Births, Deaths, Marriages and Registered Partnerships. You can do this before the birth or when registering the birth.
Parents of the same sex (two men)
If you adopt a child with another man, you can choose either of your surnames. However, this only applies to your first child. Your other children will be given the same surname as your first child. You choose the surname of your child in court when formalising the adoption.
Parents of the same sex (two women)
If two women who are married or registered partners have a child, the following applies:
- The child was conceived through an anonymous sperm donation: the child is given the surname of the co-mother (the female partner of the biological mother). This only applies if the co-mother automatically becomes the child’s lawful parent when the child is born. The parents can also choose the surname of the biological mother.
- The child was conceived through a known donor and the co-mother acknowledges the child: the child is given the surname of the biological mother. The parents can also choose the surname of the co-mother by signing a declaration of surname choice.